* "MayDay !"... *

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day, and love is in the air...
Marie leans over to Pierre and says,...
- "Pierre, kiss me !"
Our hero grabs a bottle of Merlot wine and splashes it on Marie's lips.
- "What are you doing, Pierre ?" says the startled Marie.
- "I am Pierre, the fighter pilot ! When I have red meat, I have red wine !"...
She smiles, and they start kissing.
When things began to heat up a little, Marie says,...
- "Pierre, kiss me lower"...
Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and starts pouring it all over her breasts.
- "Pierre ! What are you doing ?" asks the bewilded Marie...
- "I am Pierre, the fighter pilot ! When I have white meat, I have white wine !"...
They resume their passionate interlude and things really steam up. Marie leans close to his ear and whispers,...
- "Pierre,... kiss me lower !"...
Our hero rips off the underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it in her lap. He then strikes a match and lights it on fire...
Marie shrieks and dives into the river. Standing waist deep in the water, Marie throws her arms upwards and screams furiously,...
- "Pierre, what in the hell do you think you're doing ?"
Our hero stands up defiantly and says,...
- "I am Pierre, the fighter pilot ! If I go down, I go down in flames !"........